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Surviving Spouse

Mrs. Patricia A. Green

Surviving Spouse Corner – March 2026

Surviving Spouse / By

By Pat Green
Networks and Friendships
At our last Surviving Spouse Advisory Council meeting, the subject of communications came up. Some members espoused Facebook; others embraced LinkedIn, a text trail, or email groups. I can say good things about them all, depending on the size of the group and the message.
Still, the need for a personal connection exists.
My favorite means of communication remains a telephone call. Nothing brightens the day like a call from an old friend. A memory shared or a laugh exchanged lifts the spirits. Personal communications build strong families and good friends, and create great institutions and cohesive organizations.
Personal interaction between Chapter members provides opportunities to build friendships, exchange ideas and share experiences.
I have just returned from my annual Council Leadership Training/Convention. At an event like that, you feel the connection of shared experiences and our shared purpose. But you feel more. It’s the hugs exchanged, the appreciation of each member and their contributions, and the connection to the MOAA Leaders and staff that attend. It was an experience that energizes and renews your commitment.
Your Council and Chapter create a cohesive network for the work of MOAA. They also provide a setting for friendships to flourish.
This shared affinity should be practiced in your Chapter. The Chaplain and the Surviving Spouse Liaison serve as a personal outreach to each member. Their role is very important.
A Chapter member who lives alone and has no local family member needs a Chapter friend or neighbor to exchange a greeting with each day. It could be as simple as texting “Good Morning” and a thumbs up response. The greeter and responder should share contact information for their next of kin in the event that the greeting is not returned.
I know of one Chapter that has created such a program. They call it Buddy Check. This topic might be a good discussion point for your next meeting.
Also, the Chapter should have a list of emergency contacts for its members in case a member becomes ill at a meeting. I personally experienced two situations where that information would have been helpful.
Please…Keep caring. Keep advocating! Keep in touch! Keep connected. And “Never Stop Serving”.

Surviving Spouse Corner – March 2026 Read More »

Surviving Spouse Pat Green

Surviving Spouse Corner – November 2025

Surviving Spouse / By

November is the month of Thanksgiving and each of us has so much to be thankful for.
Sometimes, the wearies of the world will overcome us, but this month is the time to look forward and be hopeful. Each day we should examine and find at least 3 things to be grateful for. It’s easy if you start with…

The warmth of the sun, a breath of fresh air, a new day to fill with activities, new conversations, and accomplishments.

These are givens, but each of us has so many more. Concentrate on your many blessings and share your joy. I am looking forward to the Holidays and the preparations. One of the things I can do in advance is contribute to Wreaths across America.

This year Wreaths across America will be held on Saturday, December 13, 2025

Wreaths of greenery and a red bow will be laid on graves of veterans at over 4,800 cemeteries nationwide. The event is free and open to the public at these locations. You can be a participant by volunteering to place wreaths or sponsoring a wreath to honor our American Heroes. What a lovely way to give thanks for the courage and honor of a loved one. If you wish to order a wreath, they are $17. The deadline to make your order is December 1, 2025. Some cemeteries allow for a specific grave placement; some cannot because of lack of volunteers working. Check information for the location that interests you.

go to www.wreathsacrossamerica.org/

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Surviving Spouse Pat Green

Surviving Spouse Corner – September 2025

Surviving Spouse / By

Dear Readers, Last month I urged you to check beneficiaries on all your assets. Continuing on paperwork readiness, I am offering some more advice. Since we are reviewing wills…. If you receive an SBP annuity, print the information that follows and file it with your will. Your family, attorney or personal representative will be grateful.

Report a SBP Annuitant’s Death

Eligibility for a Survivor Benefit Plan annuity ends with the death of the annuitant. Prompt reporting of the annuitant’s death can help avoid delay in the final settlement of the annuity. All outstanding checks or direct deposits must be returned to DFAS before a settlement of arrears of annuity may be made.

Entitlement to the SBP annuity pay ends on the last day of the month prior to the SBP annuitant’s death. Prompt reporting of the annuitant’s death can help avoid overpayment.

Please follow the steps below to report the death of an annuitant:

Step 1 Call 800-321-1080 to report the death of an annuitant.

Step 2 Send a copy of the annuitant’s death certificate showing cause of death to:

DFAS US Military Annuitant
8899 E 56th Street
Indianapolis, IN 46249-1300
FAX 800-982-8459

Step 3 Inform the financial institution receiving payments about the death of the annuitant.

In addition to notifying DFAS, you should also notify the following agencies/departments as soon as possible.

Contact List

Social Security Administration 800-772-1213

Defense Enrollment Eligibility Reporting System (DEERS) 800-538-9552

Department of Veterans Affairs 800-827-1000 for annuitants receiving DIC (Dependency Indemnity Compensation)

Surviving Spouse Corner – September 2025 Read More »

Surviving Spouse Pat Green

Surviving Spouse Corner, July 2025

Surviving Spouse / By

Dear Readers, I have recently redone my will.
We should all redo or review this whenever a family event happens, or a considerable amount has passed since the last review. As I finished, sign, and had papers witnessed, my attorney handed me a to-do list. The first item on it was “check that beneficiaries are correct on all transferrable assets”.

I thought this was a bit overkill, but complied. Imagine my shock when I discovered that a stranger’s name was listed as a beneficiary on my brokerage account! Coincidently my broker was on vacation. After a flurry of phone calls, considerable paper shuffling, and his return to town all was corrected. The mistake was a software glitch accompanied by a user error, probably a one-time event. Even so, the brokerage firm verified that all other accounts in house had the correct names on their beneficiary records. It was a lot of work for all of us.

During the process, I kept imagining what would happen if I died before a correction was filed? So please, double check that all beneficiary accounts have the correct names on them. Keep a photocopy of all the papers you sign. An ounce of prevention is priceless.

Happy paper shuffling!

Surviving Spouse Corner, July 2025 Read More »

Surviving Spouse Pat Green

Surviving Spouse Corner – March 2025

Surviving Spouse / By

MENTAL PROWESS AND CHALLENGES
By Pat Green
Most of us have noticed a mental decline in a close friend or family member. This person is not as sharp, witty or speedy as they once were. We may wonder if we also seem so, to others.
Mental decline is not just a phenom of aging. Some as young as 40 speculate about this topic. Stress, emotions, and poor diet and sleep reduce cognitive skills, and affect all ages.
If you have had a stroke, a brain injury, or if you are concerned about a perceived mental decline, speak to your family doctor. If the doctor recognizes an issue, a Neurologist can provide a detailed cognitive skills evaluation.
Physical health and emotional health correlate with mental health. If you are consumed with grief or anxiety or dealing with a disease, deal with that first. If serious grieving extends more than two years, seek some grief counseling for help. Complicated grief is seen in 9% of widows in the 60-75 age range. A smaller percentage of men are affected.
If you want to improve your mental skills, there are some mental Strengthening Exercises that can be built into daily activities. Even a schedule of exercises a few times a day result in improvement. When you are ready, try the mental gymnastics below:

RECALL: Practice memorizing names, phone numbers, vocabulary words, MLB standings, NCAA March Madness lineups, or TV program schedules. Look at a magazine photo for a few seconds, close your eyes and try to recall items in the photo.

ANALYSIS: Read a newspaper article. Set it aside, then try to write a recap or summary of the article. Try to remember the “who, what, when, where, and why”.

SPATIAL: Rearrange a linen closet, pantry or garage. Look for the most pragmatic and yet economical use of space. Do the same exercise with drawers in kitchen, bed, or bath. While you’re at it, set aside some donation items and throw out expired items.

SOCIAL: Have a conversation every day. If you live alone, this may be a challenge. Practice small talk at the checkout line of stores. Initiate a phone call or an invitation. This is a must. Accept any invitations you receive. Try to remember a joke you can tell at your next social event.

FOCUS: Stay focused on whatever activity you are engaged. It may be a conversation, gardening, dancing, chores or workouts at the gym. Focus on listening, strength, the number of repetitions, muscles involved, posture, and breathing. Be in one with your thoughts. Meditation and prayer are very good options of mental focus.

FUN and GAMES: This can be all manner of social get-togethers. But there are some good solitary options.
Spatial: Jig saw puzzles provide color and form discernment. Manipulation of the pieces is also good hand-eye coordination practice.
Analysis: Sudoku uses number grids, but it is not a math game. It is a logic exercise. Start with easy grids and progress to expert status.
Recall: Using computer sites, you can play Bridge, Gin Rummy, or Hearts with robots. These games require a memory of cards played and the counted.
Once your skills have improved, socialize and play games with others and remember to have FUN!

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Surviving Spouse Corner

Surviving Spouse Corner – May 2024

Surviving Spouse / By

Dear members, many of you are preparing for your summer travels. After my recent experience, I want to mention a few things for your consideration before you travel.

If you have purchased travel insurance, read the policy and make sure you understand your coverage. If you have a mishap, is there a consultant who will coordinate the new arrangements that must be made. Does coverage for health issues pay for your total costs or just those that exceed your normal coverage?

Beware, unless you have a special Medicare advantage plan, Medicare does not cover overseas medical treatments or hospitalizations. Luckily, Tricare for Life does. Except for a $3,000 catastrophic annual deductible, Tricare for Life covers you and your spouse when you are abroad. This is a tremendous benefit, so do your part to protect it when it is threatened.

Even if you are covered for medical expenses, do you have coverage for the expense of changing you plans…hotel reservations, airline tickets or catch-up costs to resume a cruise. These can be costly oversights. Is the expense of repatriation of a body and those special expenses included in the coverage?

Some insurance policies must be purchased at the time of trip commitments. Others can be purchased up to the date of the beginning of your trip. Some policies cover cancellation fees and rebooking expenses and refund money…others only offer credit to be applied toward another booking. Does the policy cover a specific event or travel for a length of time?

Before purchasing travel insurance decide what coverage is important to you and/or your travel companion. Read the policy carefully with lots of difficult circumstances in mind while you are considering if the policy suits your circumstances.

Before you go, go to the web and search for the Tricare Important Contact Information. It is a trifold business card that lists Tricare stateside Contacts, Tricare Overseas Program, Tricare area offices. Also listed are Tricare Pharmacy and Dental programs. For our membership, most important is the TRICARE FOR LIFE (TFL) 1-(800)-538-9552. Always carry your military ID card with you. If you need suggestions, you can consult the Nurse Advice line. You may have a conversation with a registered nurse via Web chat, Video chat using MHSNurseAdviceLine.com. Or you can call 1(800)-874-2273 option 1. Your benefits number is on your ID card.
Bon Voyage!

Surviving Spouse Corner – May 2024 Read More »

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